It’s amazing the things you learn by paying attention to the news. Normally when the journalist is sat across from me delivering the news to the rest of the country I’m checking the weather or sorting out the next few songs or just away with the fairies.

However, on Wednesday morning I was brought back to life by a story about “rumpology”. You may be, as I was, unfamiliar with this particular science.

Apparently it goes back to Ancient Greece and Rome and is all about telling your fortune by looking at your backside so I suppose those togas would have been quite handy for easy access.

I don’t want to go into details about the ins and outs (sorry!!!) of it but suffice to say a little research on the internet reveals that one of America’s foremost rumpologists is none other than Jackie Stallone.

She is of course Sylvester’s Mum and was on Celebrity Big Brother a few years ago. If you saw her on it then you’ll know she is as mad as a box of frogs.

She is so good that you don’t have to be in the room for her to work her magic, she can do it using a photo.

By the way, for this premier service she will relieve you of $125 which includes her mailing back to you a glossy colour photograph of your behind which is, and I quote directly here, “suitable for framing”.

Who do I know that would appreciate something different for Christmas this year?