How do you find a partner if you are over fifty and unattached? NIGEL JARRETT explores some of the avenues and passes on advice from those in the know.

IMAGINE you've been cut adrift at 55 for one reason or another with a blank social diary and the feeling that your oat-sowing days ended when Blondie made their debut as a five-piece band.

Maybe what you need is a date.

You'll be pleased to know that night clubs have turned themselves into 'late-night venues', giving them a more sophisticated image as a background to romance.

Then there are scores of social clubs where singles looking for a partner can meet without turning the exercise into a cold, formal procedure.

And old acquaintances could become friends and ultimately soul mates, sharing the rest of their lives together.

Dating is an expression shunned even by many of the organisations set up to bring people together.

They call themselves 'introduction agencies' and are sought by many over-50s singles who want to embark again on a new relationship, starting with friendly encounters and ending in long-term, possibly passionate, unions.

Kim Mather, who runs the Afinitas agency in Monmouth, said 40% of her clients were over 50 and 25 to 30% of them were members.

"While older people may come with a lot of baggage, it depends on their flexibility and how much they are willing to put it behind them," she said.

"It is still very hard for people of any age to get over divorce and hurt.

"Men over sixty have a huge amount of life left but generally have less of an adventurous attitude than women. People want to travel the world or go cycling and feel it would be nicer to do these things with someone else.

"Meeting another person is not easy but it is down to personality and a combination of luck and flexibility of the individual in 'trying' someone in the nicest possible way."

Some small ads in raunchy magazines are explicit, tasteless and possibly risky - Horny Henry of Horesham who desires 'a petite blonde with GSOH for evenings in' isn't after someone to talk to about liturgical music of the Middle East, and may even be a dubious character.

Newspaper small ad columns such as the Two's Company page in the Argus are the preferred route for many. They also give safety and security advice for meeting strangers.

Melanie Wood, marketing director of the firm that runs it, said almost a quarter of the page's audience was aged 50 or over.

"All you have to do is phone up a free phone number to place your ad," she said.

"This will appear in the next available edition on the Two's Company page. To respond, you call the number that appears after the advert and leave them a reply."

She said customers liked to hear the voice of the person they were interested in. Calling up and listening to their voice allowed them to listen before they contacted them.

Mike Simmons, principal lecturer in the School of Social Studies at University of Wales College, Newport, said older people's experience of other relationships may make them less willing to compromise when embarking on a new one.

"They may be a bit less starry-eyed," he said.

"You can get a situation where people don't move in together because they are unwilling to re-commit by selling up.

"We first have a an idea of what a relationship is like from our parents.

"By the time we are 50 we have been in a relationship ourselves and may be happy to have a new one but only on our own terms."

Feel free to enjoy yourself

DON'T let your age inhibit you on a night out, advises Sarah Tutssel, popular manager of Newport's city centre Bar NP20.

"Make sure you feel nice in yourself no matter what you look like," she says. "Be confident, talk to people of all ages but don't expect anything to happen straightaway.

"Older people can still dress fashionably and comfortably because carrying it off is the important thing."

And don't worry if being out on the town is not something you've been familiar with for a while.

"If you are a bit afraid to meet people, just go out thinking you are going to enjoy yourself," Sarah says. "You will get to meet so many different people. As time goes on, you will relax and others will start noticing you.

"Bar NP20 sees itself as a late-night venue rather than a nightclub.

"Nightclubs are for the very young. Our music is varied, we have no DJs, and the music is the sort people hear on the radio.

"A lot of what I'm saying can apply to all ages. I am 27 and still single.

"When I go out it is to have a great night.

"But if people end up with a strong relationship as a result then that's marvellous."

Happy couple's union blessed

BARBARA and Mervyn Reece were both in their early sixties when their partners died.

The Labour party stalwarts had known each other for years, having worked at the old Girling brake factory in Torfaen.

Barbara, 71, and Mervyn, 65, of Glanynant Close, Ty Canol, Cwmbran, pictured left, became Mr and Mrs two years ago.

"It's absolutely wonderful," said Mrs Reece. "We did think how the family would react but they were fine and told us they only wanted us to be happy.

"We didn't want to live together because we are both Christians, so we decided to marry in church.

"We have so much in common. We like the same things and we have the same circle of friends."

Keen gardener Mrs Reece was shelling peas with her future husband when he tentatively popped the question.

"We didn't know how people would react but two weeks later he asked me again and I agreed."

Mr Reece said: "Everything was amicable and everyone wished us well."